Ok, so I never really had any, but that is what I think every time I tell people what I do for a living. I don’t have the type of career that would be considered “exciting”. In fact, when I tell people what I do, they just stare at me a little confused. You can see their minds churning because for most people it just doesn’t make sense. And it doesn’t matter what I do or what company I work for, but when I say that I work from home, that is when the idea of me seems to fall down inside of a deep canyon. See, most of the people who ask where I work or what I do are moms, and sadly what you hear far too often is that stay at home mom’s resent working moms or working moms resent stay at home moms, or we should all be so excited and supportive of each other weather you are a stay at home mom or a working mom. You see what is missing there? The work from home mom.

There are not that many of us who can say that we are work from home moms that work for someone else. I hope to be so lucky one day to say I work from home and for myself, but that is not the case a this point. Many of us work full time jobs that require us to be in the office and available to our teams or clients or managers all day. And therein lies the problem.

Six years ago, when my company decided to close our office and send everyone to work from home, I was thrilled. I had a 2-month-old and a 4-year-old at home that were not yet in school and I was taking care of my grandmother during the day coming off of maternity leave. Starting to work from home was going to be amazing. I could find a way to manage the three of them, my work, and of course the household and have so much more time in my day. The best part? I didn’t have to get up in the morning, get myself ready, and manage my kids before getting to work at 8am. I could literally roll out of bed and start working, and with a 2-month-old who hated the idea of sleep, this would be incredible. It IS incredible. I am so thankful that I have the ability to work from home and for all of the advantages that it has given me.

As time has passed, I have come to realize that I can’t do all those things and continue with a career. I must have my office time dedicated to being office time just like a working mom. I am able to do a lot more during my slow times and break times than someone going into a traditional office, like throwing a load of laundry in the wash or running my kid’s homework to the school or talking to a friend who needs me. There are wonderful times that I can pop out for a quick bite in the middle of the day that I know most moms working or stay at home would just die to be able to do. There are also days that I am so busy that I am working before the kids get up, and still working when the kids go to sleep and they have to each fast food that Granny brought home because we all knew I could barely step away from my desk long enough to go to the bathroom.

That is how people end up looking down in that canyon for me. They pretty much always assume that I have all the time in the world to do anything they might need in the middle of the working day. They hear that I work from home and immediately ask me if I can watch their kids during the day, pop over to pick up their dry cleaning, or text me randomly in the middle of the day asking me to take care of some paperwork they need help with or ask me what it is like to be able to take naps in the middle of the day. These are the same people who would never ask a stay at home mom or a working mom any of those same questions because they would assume that each of those moms was far too busy or didn’t want to offend them.

I got myself into it I suppose. Back when I was trying to do it all, I signed up to be on the PTO at my kid’s school. Sounded like a great idea. I was promised it would not take up too much time and I could do most of it after working hours. I guess that’s how they always get you. Four years later after being begged I was elected as the Treasurer. It’s nothing to write home about, no one else in their right mind wanted to do it. It’s not really all that hard, and quite a bit of it could happen after hours or while I was traveling for hockey. I had good support from the president of the PTO who made me aware when things were there to be deposited or there was documentation that needed my attention at the school. No problem, right? Wrong!

There is a thought process for PTO/PTA members (I know this after following multiple groups and listening to them discuss their challenges) that no matter what deadline you provide a parent or teacher or child they are always allows to break it and you should have to run around, ignoring all of your other responsibilities to make that deposit, check, or order happen for that person, because we hate to say no and after all, we are doing it all for literally everyone else. This mentality, that you and your day or your work are not anywhere near as important as that person who was asked 2 weeks ago to get you the paperwork you needed so you could pay that vendor and are now in a panic because the vendor is there and they need the check. A working mom would get a call saying, hey, can you help us out later today and we will let the vendor know we will have it for them tomorrow? A stay and home mom would get an, oh my gosh I am so sorry, but is there any way? The work from home mom? “I need this check right away, please write it and bring it to the school in the next 30 minutes”. WHAT?!?!?!?! Even my boss doesn’t expect that kind of turn-around from me!

It’s not just other moms, even my own mom has been guilty of this. She doesn’t answer her phone or respond to a text while she is at work, but call me in the middle of the day to help her with her job? You betcha! My husband also works from home, and even he is guilty. I kid you not, he will sit down on the couch behind my desk and just start watching a TV Show like there are not four other TVs in the house. To be fair, he usually at least asks if I have to be on the phone.

I am not complaining, really,x I am not. I LOVE my life and I feel incredibly lucky to be able to work from home and not have to worry about scheduling summer camps, and buying new clothes for work, and being able to pop over to drop off the field trip form that I forgot to send in. I also love being able to say that I have a career and telling my kids about my day at work and showing them every day that dedication to my career and since they are boys it is really important to me for them to see that a woman can have it all, in case they decide they want to marry one that wants it all.

I have the utmost respect for both the working moms and the stay at home moms, but I am lost down in this canyon and everyone else is standing on the overlook trying to figure out which side I actually belong to. The good news is I like the view.